Advice with Recovery - much appreciated

[Pablosaur]

This is a long time coming but i've been in panic mode for so long I just need some advice without being judged really as i know im an idiot. Long post but please any advice is appreciated. Im losing my mind as no one seems to be able to help.

At age 22 in Around April/May 2015 i ran a cycle of test-e 250mg twice a week all the way up to September (few weeks in between i missed out because i couldn't get hold of test). I was young and stupid and was extremely negligent towards possible side affects.

Now i just want to be back to normal.

I threw anavar in towards the end of the cylce and my balls shrivelled up to nothing at one point. throughout the cycle and to this day i have had ed issues. I didnt use hcg or an AI on cycle. I think high E2 caused the ED.

At the end of the cycle in september 2015 i did a few weeks of nolvadex following dosgaes recommended online somewhere for about 4 weeks and threw in some arimidex not really knowing what i was doing. My libido was down and i always struggled to maintain an erection.

I had a bloods done in june 2016 after months of avoiding the GP and he said everything was fine and in range so i put it down to being a psychological thing

I was down and did some stupid 2/3 week course of winstrol at 50mg a day before i went on holiday in September 2016 as a bit of a confidence booster with some friends who are also uneducated on steroid use.

I paid my GP to see the blood results from june 2016 and the only useful value i could really see was that my total serum testosterone was 11.7nmol/L. This was 7 months after finishing the cycle so within range but when i looked ... well out for a 23 year old ?! My GP never picked up on this ... then i foolishly threw more steroids in myself ?!

I honestly just don't know what to do. My balls to me do look smaller than they once were but not severely atrophied and i just dont get the sexual urges i used to before steroids. I just dont feel like i used to before i touched them.

I paid to privately see an endo and he recommended i just wait it out as im young and it could take up to 3 years to return to homeostasis. The GP said i could have counselling.

I have been on OTC test boosters and PCT product with reservatrol in for the past two months and had bloods done last week which came in at:-

Testosterone 29.7nmol/L (7.6-31.4)

Free Test 0.677nmol/L (0.30 - 1)

Oestradiol 226.7pmol/L (0-191.99)

SHBG 31.24nmol/L (16-55)

FSH 2.03 IU/L (1.5 - 12.4)

LH 7.9 IU/L (1.7 - 9.6)

Evidently i have some function down there ! The high E2 would explain why i still feel crap and have no libido etc, and balls are still small, as i added arimidex to trial and my testicles increased in size dramatically and hung lower. I fiddled around with the dosage a bit and fluctuated between high and low E2 without really finding my sweet spot ... but the mental side of things has led me to seek advice on what is actually best to do rather than mess with my hormones and emotions like this.

My question is should i stop all supps now and see where im at ? As the E2 is now high im scared it will just hammer that high test level back down as soon as i stop

So would i be better implementing a suicidal AI like aromasin and carrying on with the supplements so my testes come back a bit more before discontinuing by tapering ?

Thanks !!! Your time is so much appreciated im so down and on the verge of a breakdown

 

[BigSwolenPussy]

Nothing about your version of PCT would have helped you recover. Honestly, Im not an expert in reading bloods but the only thing that seems out of whack is your estrogen levels. Aromasin isn't going to help with a pct but will lower your E2 temporarily.

We have a board sponsor that could likely help you get everything back to normal. Maybe you can talk to him. IncreaseMyT

Your post would be a great sticky in the "Why not to used AAS at your age and Why not to use AAS when you have no idea what you are doing."

 

[Pablosaur]

Nothing about your version of PCT would have helped you recover. Honestly, Im not an expert in reading bloods but the only thing that seems out of whack is your estrogen levels. Aromasin isn't going to help with a pct but will lower your E2 temporarily.

We have a board sponsor that could likely help you get everything back to normal. Maybe you can talk to him. IncreaseMyT

Your post would be a great sticky in the "Why not to used AAS at your age and Why not to use AAS when you have no idea what you are doing."

My theory is that by using aromasin to control and decrease the E2, that my testosterone will increase further, allowing the testicles to regain more size, and then slowly tapering off the OTC products (which are acting like serms) and aromasin and hopefully i will be left at a much better point with a reasonable test level. Thoughts ?

 

[3J]

youve shown a patterns of making foolish mistakes over and over so long as you think youre ok youll just jump on another cycle..

stop using the otc test booster, wait 4 weeks, and retest your labs to see what youre really at

 

[Pablosaur]

I have clearly shown that pattern yes i do not disagree. But no i will never be touching steroids again if i can attain anywhere near the natural levels i had before touching them. I simply just was a young idiot and even though because of this mess im much more educated, will never touch them again if i can help it. I just dont trust myself.

I'm not here to argue, simply seek advice and i appreciate your reply. I'm just wondering if you could tell me exactly why my theory is incorrect and would not be beneficial ? I have reasonable levels all round apart from E2, which is supressing my test further. I'm literally just worried that coming off this OTC pct product (contains reservatrol) that the high E2 will slap my test right back down.

Wheras possibly adding aromasin to lower E2, increasing test, lowering SHBG and then tapering off both seems to me to have a more successful chance of returning me to a higher natural test level ?

Thank you

 

[3J]

you should come off, let your hormones naturally balance out, test.. then see what steps are needed..

 

[jojo25jj]

Aromasin is better to control then arimidex. Arimidex binds the enzymes only temporary and if you try to regulate it, that can be complicated because it releases the enzymes again and the E2 shot up heavily. Aromasin kills the enzymes and you can better find the ideal dosage (so my experience while I was using at on my TRT). Yes, it's the E2 what is making the things worse on you. I also know that from my own experience but on aromasin my testicles was instantly increasing and set up my libido, energy and erections to normal state.
Too much E2 is a very bad thing for a man.

You should also test Prolactin level. That also can lower your libido and inhibit erections.