Emotionally Weak...how do I toughen up?

H

Hugh Myron

New member
I wasn't even in a relationship with this girl. It was clear she was interested in me. We would always meet at the library by showing up at the same times, I did all kinds of fitness tests on her. When I just met her, we did go on one date but she gave me a cheek and I knew I should have moved on then. She would text me dirty saying I make her so eager, and she wants to be phucked on a flat bench.

She makes all these statuses about me on her friends Facebook account and denies it even though I caught her in the act by taking my ex back for a few days to see how she would react. Surprisingly enough her friends account, the one I accused of saying all this lovey dove stuff about me, added my ex girl on Facebook.

So next time I see this girl, I pull her aside to talk and profess my love for her and tell her she should break up with her boyfriend. ( I know big mistake), I lay it all on the table, holding nothing back. She responds by telling me she's sorry she lead me on but did nothing to make it seem like we would be more friends, and that it would be crazy to break up with her boyfriend.

I move on, but the statuses about her love for me continue from her friends account, so I delete them both from Facebook and Twitter and texted her that I was past the library friendship stage so if she wanted to continue she should call me to accept my dinner invite which is on always on the table during the time I am single.

Now you all know I am over thinking this and should never put all my eggs in one basket but I deeply loved this women unrequited or convinced myself I did anyways and I "waited" for her for 5 months. During the last month, I got so depressed and lifted only 5x in total and went through a brief gaming addiction on an online game to cope.

Today, I started lifting and dieting strictly, and I feel free. Looking back, I feel really pathetic that a woman I wasn't even in a relationship with could affect me so badly for so long. You have all been through the ups and downs of a relationship, and some of you even suffered the divorce process.

How can I learn to toughen up? I'm afraid of having a real relationship and watching it go south. The fact I even considered suicide for a girl that I wasn't even dating is extremely cowardly and shows I've got a lot to experience to toughen up.

Looking for thoughts, opinions, and what I can do to move forward.

You're going to ask "Well you had an ex. You should know what to do". The one I refer to as my "ex" was never a real relationship, she was from Nz and I'm from Canada, and she "almost" moved here before meeting another local guy, but we are still good friends. That still means my relationship experience is little to none.
 
One of my friends has an issue with woman as well, except his issue is that any time a girl shows him any attention what so ever he almost instantly falls in love with them or thinks hes in love with them. This usually happens until the girl tells him they are uninterested and then he goes through a brief episode of depression until the next girl comes along he can fall in love with. Everyone's mind and way of thinking is different, so to ask what one person can do to "fix" his or her way of thinking regarding the opposite sex isn't always legit advice. In his situation I feel like he had low self esteem when it came to his social and physical appearance. I always urge him to exercise with me and always invite him out to social situations with friends so he can grow and learn a bit. My opinion on women is that there are millions of them out there and if a woman doesn't give you the time of day or is a biotch, then maybe you shouldn't waste your time. I don't want to be a dick but quit feeling sorry for yourself, work on your physical and mental well being, go out, hang out with friends, be social, make an effort and you will meet the right person. And once again when it comes to them hoes that play games, AINT NOBODY GOT TIME FOR DAT!
 
Go out and have fun man you will foreget all about it. Get 2 or 3 friends, go to the bar, and then a strip club. Life happens to everyone you just gotta man up and move forward.
 
I'm a bit of a boy scout, I don't drink alcohol. Not a drop since I turned 19. I also had bad experiences with clubs, so I do not go any more. That kind of scene just isn't for me. I also do not have any friends that I can simply go out for a good time with.

That reminds me, back in December I went to the school gym late one night. I had to commute there, and it was a Friday night so the bus was full of drunken sloots. This one girl, a legit 8/10 comes over and sits on my lap and starts complimenting my eyes, telling me I am cute, and starts tugging on my scarf. I kid you not, I could have made out with her right then and there, but instead I grabbed her number. I thought maybe I could take her out for a coffee when she sobered up. So I text her the next day and have to remind her who I am, and I then call her up to set up a date, and she says "sorry, I was drunk". This just shows you how easy the club scene is, if I was a guy going to the club alot of these girls are no challenge at all, any man with half a pair of balls could bring them home. Shallow, easy. Fun, yeah probably, but I'm looking for long term fun with someone I know, not a random hook up. I want to work for it. Going out is just too easy.

I'm also a virgin which is pretty irrelevant at this point, but I have a bit of a superiority complex when it comes to dating. I try to move forward, but after meeting the girl that almost moved her entire life just to be with me, I have some pretty ridiculous expectations of what I feel I deserve. I want to become more open-minded and just accept other people for how they are, and seek out that person that is really compatible with me instead of judging the rest about them. I've went on a few dates here and there, but I quickly disregard the women when they aren't meeting my expectations on a first impression. That girl who has lead me on, is the only one I have met where none of that matters, and I like her for who she is.

My ex was making bank as an accountant, she was a competitive gymnast locally, she was a girl guide leader, she had an 8/10 body and an 8/10 face, she was a really nice person albeit very complicated, she grew up in a rich family, she did not drink alcohol at all, and she viewed social media as "slutty" so refused to have it. She was also a master chef that could cook literally anything, she liked to bake cookies. She loved to travel, and do all kinds of fun things, she would send me pics of the experiences that I was jealous that she got to experience. She only surrounded herself with a few close friends, but was relatively forever alone like I was surprisingly. She would send me the texts of all the guys that wanted to bang her, and we'd laugh over them. The whole time I couldn't believe it, I thought it was an internet troll playing a game on me, and I once accused her of being a man until we met on Skype. Girl was way above me in the looks department in terms of our faces, and she was the first one to look past my butterface. The whole time I was thinking "wow damn, this seems too good to be true", although I was an asshole to her for so long before she told me she loved me. I think I liked her more for the life she lived then her personality and her as a person.

Its like experiencing the best, and then you can't expect any less moving forward. My expectations are to meet someone like that, you know what I mean? I think the answer is simple, and that is I have to get out there and start talking to more people, and talking to more women and taking them out on dates. Keep my standards, but lower my expectations. To put it in simpler terms, its like after you include tren in one of your cycles, once you've experienced the amazing changes that happen to your body when using tren, you cannot cycle without it.

Looking for thoughts, and opinions on this.
 
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Its all about you!

Hey bro don’t put that Pussy on a pedestal!! You are better than that; you have to put yourself first instead of every woman that steals your heart! Trust me man women are very misleading with their behavior, they throw out signals that make us feel like they want us but it’s all a fucking game to them. You need to have the mentality that nothing can break you down! Especially a Woman!! You almost need to be conceded in a way, and be careful who you let your guard down for. HIT THE GYM MAN! The better you feel about yourself, the harder it’s going to be for a Woman to break you down!
And like I always say “the best way to get over a girl, is get back on top of another one”
Good Luck Bro
 
duuuude.. there's two types when it comes to men/women. one chasing and the other walking away! remember that!! don't drive down the road looking at every ford focus thinking "damn.. got to get one of those!!" do you? it's basic human nature to want what's juuuust out of your reach. when i chick knows she OWNS you, you just became the ford focus. took me a long time to figure this out! i'm turning 45 and have 5 women. 22, 25, 30, 36, and gulp 40 (oldest to date but hot body :) ) all know i don't give a fuk. girl asked me the other day " can you stop sleeping with other women?" told her, not gona happen. either join in or do what you got to do. got to make them work for it bro.
 
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