Female Help,,, are you surprised??

[bigbuffstaples]

I'm just curious... Why is it, that i meet a girl, and it goes really well, and she's really into me, and they even start saying shit like "I don't wanna screw this up" and "I'm affraid i'll scare you off" (that was from the last one, she was affraid to say how much she was falling for me so fast cause she thought it would scare me off), and shit like that, then all of a sudden, literally out of nowhere their like "Ahh, I don't know if i'm ready for this" or "We should slow things down a little" (That was 2 girls ago, and fuck, trust me, it was going SLOW as fuck already, SO SLOW!! I was with her for almost a month and i never even fucked the girl).

Like, do girls only like guys who are insanely nice to them for what like 2-3 weeks? Am i just boosting their confidence with compliments and then they wanna go back to the assholes?? Should i start being very cold and emotionless with girls i meet now? Will they like that better? Or is it that i just keep meeting girls that are fucked up and have insane issues??

What do you girls think??? Cause it's really getting to me, like i'm an attractive guy and i'm really nice to girls i'm with and treat them very well,,, i just can't figure out where it goes wrong all of a sudden???

 

[Spartie]

Bro...i go through the same thing with women. The answer is probably somewhere in between: Its part you, and part them. You may indeed be selecting the wrong women, women that are "emotionally unavailable", women that are still in a relationship, at least mentally, thus you are the rebound? Don't beat yourself up, but do take an honest, strong look at yourself to see where you are at fault and what you can/could do different. The easiest thing in the world to do is to blame others..."chicks are all nuts"...which may not actually be the truth. Good luck Bro!

 

[bigbuffstaples]

see it's hard to say, cause one girl didn't date anyone for a year until me,,, i think she just wasn't ready for a relationship because she was too used to the single life and couldn't handle it right now. One i broke up with like 2 days ago, i think it was sort of a rebound, and she knows she's not gettin back with that guy, we both know it. But she's definatly got feelings for me but i just don't know if she thinks now is the right time (i sort of agree with it because of the situation though)... thing is,,, it's fucked cause the girls say all these things, and everything seems great, then all of a sudden its over,,,, and the confusion sets in.

 

[Fyre]

Bro...i go through the same thing with women. The answer is probably somewhere in between: Its part you, and part them. You may indeed be selecting the wrong women, women that are "emotionally unavailable", women that are still in a relationship, at least mentally, thus you are the rebound? Don't beat yourself up, but do take an honest, strong look at yourself to see where you are at fault and what you can/could do different. The easiest thing in the world to do is to blame others..."chicks are all nuts"...which may not actually be the truth. Good luck Bro!

Oh, that was a good post Spartie! Well said.

 

[Fyre]

Hang in there bigbuffstaples, you'll meet the right one.

 

[DJ_rockett]

You could be moving too fast for them. I've made the same mistake in my life. Girls pay lots of attention to our actions. I'd say move at a more relaxed casual pace regardless of how you feel about her. Be busy with your life and allow her to call and put out there how much she wants to see you. It sounds like they're saying "slow down boy"

 

[SweetSerenity]

I agree with Dj Rockett you could be moving to fast for them but not for you. I think you should just go about your daily routines and she'll call you when she's not busy or if she wants to talk to you. U'll see the less attention you pay to her the more she'll be calling you and wanting to see you.

 

[CaptainAwesome]

The easiest thing in the world to do is to blame others..."chicks are all nuts"...which may not actually be the truth. Good luck Bro!

oh come on, i love my girlfriend but she is nuts.

dont compliment a girl too much and dont get so nuts over her in the beginning. you need to make it clear that you would be fine with or without them. im not saying be an asshole just dont be too clingy. this should work out naturally and if they dont it wasnt meant to be.

 

[bigbuffstaples]

Good posts,, good advice... and CaptainAwesome,, i try to do that, but then i can't tell if i'm going too far and being an asshole, or not far enough... i guess i'll have to work on that and just figure it out on more bitches, haha, thanks for the advice y'all.

 

[Faye]

I know lots of girls that go for jerks, and guess what, they're all f**ked up in the head and I wouldn't wish them on anyone. Stay your nice sweet self and someone will come along, and like you just the way you are. I know, a married a "nice guy". Finding him was hard, but it was totally worth the wait.

 

[Flash_Gordon]

Hang in there bigbuffstaples, you'll meet the right one.

I met the right one before, however I wasn't her right one....

 

[bigbuffstaples]

I met the right one before, however I wasn't her right one....

I hear ya buddy... i hear ya.

 

[Hotwtrbby]

This post is from a while ago but if you still would like some input I'm here to give it I always find myself in long relationships but this summer when I ended mine I decided I would be single for a while, however I still wanted to date. Some of the guys I went out with just got too interested too quickly and for some reason it's not a turnoff perse, but as bad as it sounds I think some girls like the "chase" as much as guys. Several of the guys fell under the category of getting too interested too fast, and it's those ones that i found that I distanced myself from. HOWEVER - when they stop calling for a while, I found that I called THEM. I think there is a fine line between showing affection and interest and showing too much affection and too much interest. You just have to find it