Anxiety and Depression From Lifting, Need opinions

[Conrad0032]

Hello,

If you have some time, please read this and give me some opinions!!!

I know this is my first post and you may think I'm clueless on lifting and such, but stick with me please. I'm not a member on any other forum for lifting asides from bodybuilding, but I thought you guys could help me more.

So I am Conrad. I'm 18 years old, 19 in twenty days. I've been lifting for 5 years, extremely seriously for about 2-3 of those. You might think... extremely serious eh? As if... he's 18. Well I count all my macros and hit them all on target within 5g of each (315 protein, 500 carbs, 92 fat), I have not missed a training day in these three years, except for scheduled weeks off, I only eat clean food i.e. tilapia, chicken, rice, sweet potatoes, whole grain bread, etc. I hope you get the point I don't want you to have to read more of this.

So here's the real problem and question I have.
My lifts have just stalled completely over the past year and a half. I train my god damn ass off 5 days a week. I honestly feel I am one of the few people in my gym that actually trains hard. However, despite all my efforts I just can't set any PRs. I keep upping my calories, tried new training programs, tried different schemes, and nothing... I leave the gym depressed just about every day. I sit in my room most weekends because I don't want to drink because I'm scared it'll ruin my chances of breaking a PR even more. I get anxiety and guilt and such whenever I do something that's isn't spot-on with bodybuilding code (like eat a piece of candy).

Now I'm not the biggest guy, I'm 215lbs at 6 foot 3, probably 12% body fat. I would consider myself an ectomorph. The last time I can remember myself being truly happy was not when I had a girl friend, not when I went to a party, but when I was hitting PRs in lifts monthly. Without progress, I feel lost and hopeless.

I'm really looking into starting anabolic steroids to help me get past this phase. I just want to see some kind of progress with all the effort I'm putting in! Does anyone have any takes on a 19 year old like myself taking steroids?

Sorry for the long post. Thanks a lot for anyone who took the time to read!

 

[horusculture]

Wat are ur supplements looking like? Ever tried creatine? Take off for a month str8. Ur young. Let ur body rest. S hen u come back hit the gym with a totally new regimen. I kno that month off will kill u. But it will shock ur body and when u return u will feel pumpsike never before.

I was like u when I was ur age. Please don't make my mistake. Ur too young for any steroid. Once u juice u cane really gain at all naturally. I mean, u can, but itll never be the same. And u havent came close to ur natty max. Just listen to us. Take 4 weeks off. Research. Plan. And go back in the gym not harder, but smarter. Easier said then done

Good luck.

Ps nobody going to agree with u juicing here. So this post is really out of place. Change ur train of thoughts too. This shit is more mental than u think. Ur too worried u probably have stress n depression problems. Steroids will make this worse for u when u come off. Cycles only last a few months (if done correctly) so when u come off u would be suicidal if u think like this now...

 

[Conrad0032]

Creatine, whey, casein, fish oil, multivitamin for supplements. I took a week off a little bit ago and it did nothing good for me. I can't not lift for a month, sorry, I would feel like a piece of shit and probably go off the deep end.

Also my lifts (if anyone cares...) are 545 deadlift, 480 squat, 315 BB row, for 8 or so, +90lb dips for 6, and I've benched 290 but my shoulder doesn't like benching so I mainly do dumbbells.

 

[confish7]

"not missed a training day in these three years." At your age I could have never done that but your stats look awesome. Too awesome to be depressed about. Personally I found my gains in my 20's to be much better than in my teens. Progress isn't everything either though. Gains take time and the benefits of taking care of yourself will keep the guilt at bay. I say you have some beers on the weekends and try not be so hard on yourself. Your 19.

 

[lakers0812]

If you are doing exactly what you say, then you should be hitting pr's consistently. Even though you are young, and this probably isn't the case, I'd get your testosterone checked out (total test and free test). You can also get estradiol checked, but I seriously doubt there is a problem in any of those areas. If you every plan on using gear in the future, get used to getting blood work done pre cycle and post cycle. As for steroids, there's no point at your age. You are most likely producing a ton of testosterone that you can keep taking advantage of, after all you weigh 215. I'd personally wait until you are 22 or older (Even that is too young for most people).

 

[Conrad0032]

That's good to hear your gains were better in your 20s, confish. As for the drinking, I think Ima have to pass, gains are bad enough as they are.

Checking my testosterone is something to do I guess. I'm sure it's fine, as I don't want to be making BS excuses here. But it'd still be interesting to see regardless. I will definitely be getting blood work done regularly and keeping on top of everything if/when I start on the juice, thx for the tip. But yeah, very true about still having high testosterone levels now. It's just frustrating putting all this effort in and getting barely anything back, maybe I'm just being impatient.

Thx for the replies codfish and lakers.

 

[Dapperdog]

Hey man, I think you are down in the dumps for nothing. Your lifts are good for your age and size. And 6'3 215 is far from an ectomorph brother. You are just young. Your best gains are yet to come, as your muscle matures it will grow big time.

 

[XELFLEC]

Watch this before you decide to use gear

Anabolic Steroids: an evolving black market - YouTube



Scary right?

 

[XELFLEC]

Second have you read the book beyond brawn?

Mixed reviews but it really does have some good info and might help you change your mindset.

 

[Conrad0032]

Dapperdog, thanks. I do hope the gains start coming soon enough but its unimaginable to me right now to just start getting better gains than I use to. Also, I definitely have ectomorph qualities, I might have a mix between two.

XELFLEC, I'll definately watch that video when I have some time, always love documentaries and such. And I have not read that book. I'll have to give it a read through sometime. What's it about? Thanks.

 

[XELFLEC]

The video is to scare u.

The book is alot of repetitive jibber jabber with a good theory to apply to get past dead ends.

Most is common sense to an experienced lifter but the way he applies it is what made me take a slightly different approach to lifting.

 

[JMEALS]

My friend steroids will only increase your anxiety and guilt in your situation. That is not the answer for you..What i suggest is a differant approach..Take OFF from lifting for 1 entire month...youve been lifting non stop since your 13 yrs old according to your post..Youve just hit a road block..After the rest youll come back refreshed with a new hunger and i guareentee your gains will start back again...Trust me on this one ...

 

[JMEALS]

Sorry..about to double post

 

[Teutonic]

Youngman.

Listen to me.

Go to training forum and read my thread on Fit at 50.

You got to find other shit to focus on outside the gym so that going to the gym is like coming home. You are burned out. Obsessing on p r s is good but what else interests you ? At 19 I was a p hound son...if you think your stuck..you are.

Awesome lift s but there s so much more to life than the iron. Don t let the gym wreck you...it s my life boat in this fkd up society we got around us...

You live at home ?

 

[KarenGray]

I feel so sad to hear about your problem. Anxiety and depression are so frustrating and difficult to know how to treat depression and anxiety.