Hrnyfckr
Eager student
I'd really love to hear from my sobros!
I'm 9 months sober... My sobriety date is 2/14/14.
I have a sponsor... My sponsor has a sponsor.
My sponsor is also a body builder.
At his suggestion I had to end my cycle when I started working the steps. It was hell, to be honest, but ultimately good for me. I was using roids to aquire a confidence that I thought I didn't have. I lost 40 lbs of muscle and had to face my body dismorphia and my inner shortcomings, and deal with a six month loss of my sex drive. I'm really happy now in sobriety and maybe for the first time ever... I saw an endo, hoping to get TRT... But lo luck... My test levels have recovered to exactly where they're supposed to be for a man of my age. (53 years btw). My sex drive and function are back in full force.
I'm coming to find out that people really like me... And it has nothing to do with what I look like... I'm becoming more open and kind and gentle.... All good things for me. I now am experiencing an inner confidence that I could not have before imagined.
I love body building and my sponsor says I can do whatever I want (within reason) in terms of cycling when I have a year sober. He suggests 300/test per week with 4iu/HGH per day. I recently aquired the HGH which I will start soon (since it takes months to build up and do it's thing and it is not at all mind or mood altering) And I'll add the roids back when I get my year... I'm thinking 200/test with 200/tren... A good compromise.
One of the main character defects revealed in my 4th step is arrogance... It's really my "go to" when I'm in fear or resentment. I'm really liking the humble man that I get to be in sobriety, however... I don't wanna muck up what I now have... Or sidetrack the man I get to be today!
I'm not looking for advise here as much as I want to hear the experience, strength, and hope of my sobros.
PM me if you prefer to stay anonymous on Ology.
I'm 9 months sober... My sobriety date is 2/14/14.
I have a sponsor... My sponsor has a sponsor.
My sponsor is also a body builder.
At his suggestion I had to end my cycle when I started working the steps. It was hell, to be honest, but ultimately good for me. I was using roids to aquire a confidence that I thought I didn't have. I lost 40 lbs of muscle and had to face my body dismorphia and my inner shortcomings, and deal with a six month loss of my sex drive. I'm really happy now in sobriety and maybe for the first time ever... I saw an endo, hoping to get TRT... But lo luck... My test levels have recovered to exactly where they're supposed to be for a man of my age. (53 years btw). My sex drive and function are back in full force.
I'm coming to find out that people really like me... And it has nothing to do with what I look like... I'm becoming more open and kind and gentle.... All good things for me. I now am experiencing an inner confidence that I could not have before imagined.
I love body building and my sponsor says I can do whatever I want (within reason) in terms of cycling when I have a year sober. He suggests 300/test per week with 4iu/HGH per day. I recently aquired the HGH which I will start soon (since it takes months to build up and do it's thing and it is not at all mind or mood altering) And I'll add the roids back when I get my year... I'm thinking 200/test with 200/tren... A good compromise.
One of the main character defects revealed in my 4th step is arrogance... It's really my "go to" when I'm in fear or resentment. I'm really liking the humble man that I get to be in sobriety, however... I don't wanna muck up what I now have... Or sidetrack the man I get to be today!
I'm not looking for advise here as much as I want to hear the experience, strength, and hope of my sobros.
PM me if you prefer to stay anonymous on Ology.
