Years of mistakes led me to this moment (long)

[Captain America]

So I'm pretty new here and some of you know of my injuries and my TB500 log, but that's not what I want to talk about. I'd like to put my past AAS usage on the table because it may have caused permanent changes in my body. As you guys read this you will find that it's been a train wreck over the years due to ignorance and just not being resourceful until now. The funny thing that I found is that doing internet searches don't give you anywhere near the insight that being a member of a board gives you by logging on everyday.

So I'll start with my stats, I'm 38yrs old 6'0 250. I've done probably 5-6 cycles and all except for the one I did last year none of them had pct!

Before you start in on "god what a dumb ass" etc, please allow me to paint a picture for you. I was a Marine corps infantry man and did my first cycle of sustanon 250 @ just 22yrs of age. I had a couple guys in my unit who I listened to on dosage etc. what we did was ramp up the dosage and then taper it down. There was never any pct. Keep in mind we were marines shut off from the outside world. There was no internet to turn to!
Without all of the details I did that quite a few times the last time was when I was 27. Then there was a 10yr break. The last cycle I did was test e and tbol. I did pct of clomid/nolva and felt like it went well except for the fact that I had to start pct a bit early do to an injury.

Other than being on cycle I have been feeling pretty crappy for years. I'd go to the gym for a couple months and then quit because I wasn't seeing the gains that I used to.

So just recently again I did something dumb and did a tbol only cycle @ 60mg a day and then did clomid@50mg a day for 21days. I have not been feeling good at all. Which brings me to the point of this thread. I have never had a blood test to get a baseline, so I guess we will never know. I'm going today to get bloodwork,but it's only been 2 weeks tops since stopping clomid. I know that isn't an ideal time frame, but I want to see what the hell is going on and then I'll go back in a month to see where I'm at.

Ive learned so much in a shirt time here that I know I'm getting on the right path after all these years and bad cycles.

Thanks for any help you guys can give throughout the future.sorry if everything is spelled wrong or auto corrected. This I phone sucks!

 

[Matt0071]

hey man, commend u for your honesty, alot of people dont spill there beans like this and act like there an experienced user and know everything from dieting to aas ect
well i can say this, your T from improper PCT protocol is probably at an ultimate low, which is why u are feeling the way u do, the signs will be there with low T, anxiety, depression, lack of energy, no sex drive and the list goes on, u made a good leap in getting bloods done, as living like that is horrid and had those symtoms as well, goodluck with your bloods and hopefully make the right choices down the road of what works and what doesnt, people have tried the " oral only cycles" and pretty much got nowhere other then feeling like complete shit afterwords!

 

[Captain America]

Thanks for the response. I forgot to mention that one of the cycles of sustanon / primo was out of a muscular development magazine and it used the taper method. We were so young and dumb. The tbol only cycle I have no excuse for that one. I read many posts saying not to, but I ignored them and focused on what I wanted to hear. I vow never to make these mistakes again. I'm hoping after the bloods come back I can get on track. I have a funny feeling trt might be in my future.

 

[Captain America]

I also wanted to add that if it weren't for being on this site and talking to megatron I probably still wouldn't have gone to get checked out. I used privatemdlabs thanks to him.

 

[Matt0071]

yeah well we can all say whatever bro, trt or not, bloods is the only way to really see whats going on
if i would have to guess " Yes" your T is low, but again bloods will tell u the true story!

 

[SamSport]

in that 10 years break, even without pct your body had enough time to recover to his ''new T lvl''( wich could be lower indeed). Just wait till 2-3 months after PCT to get next bloodwork to see what's going on.. just learn from your experiences and look forward

 

[Captain America]

in that 10 years break, even without pct your body had enough time to recover to his ''new T lvl''( wich could be lower indeed). Just wait till 2-3 months after PCT to get next bloodwork to see what's going on.. just learn from your experiences and look forward

Thanks. 2-3 months seems like a life time with the way I feel now. Over that 10yr break I was never the same again. I just thought it was part of getting older. Little did I know.

 

[XELFLEC]

Alot of people think pct is a waste anyway.
Your body will recover or it won't.

And forums are also full of people who regurgitate the same bro science over and over.
If enough people say it more people believe it and you can't deny mass in numbers. Or can you?

I'll admit its good to read forums but you have to take 75% of what you read and make your own opinion and perform your own experiments to learn your body. Most forums are back by an agenda, and that's to push sponsors products.

 

[LiquidSmoke21]

I hope everything works out for you bro. I have made mistakes in the past by listening to someone who thought they knew everything about AAS and they didn't know jack shit. I ended up doing multiple Deca only cycles no PCT from age 29-32 thank god I never got messed up. Now at 38 and going to start up again, I'm happy I found this board because a few months ago I was going to start a cycle I shouldn't have. This board is a lifesaver.

 

[Therealkozmo]

Kudos. Keep opening your mind and allow yourself to continue to get smarter

Don't trust anyone who acts like an expert. No experts only vets

 

[Matt0071]

wouldnt wait to get bloods, i know exactly the way u feel, u got the symtoms of low T, why further the shit!, felt like garbage as well, after recovery to alcholism, i got my levels checked as well and they were as low as could be, felt anxious, depressed, sex drive was shit, u could put the hottest girl infront of me and my sex drive was in the ultimate low, all i wanted to do is lounge around all day long, all in all felt miserable, i feel great now by the way, cruise on 200mg/week for the last year and a half and feel awesome bro

 

[Captain America]

Blood has been drawn, so as soon as I get the results I will let you guys know. I'm actually hoping it is low test becuase if it isn't I don't know what else to do. Hopefully results are in tomorrow.

 

[phoneman268]

Blood has been drawn, so as soon as I get the results I will let you guys know. I'm actually hoping it is low test becuase if it isn't I don't know what else to do. Hopefully results are in tomorrow.

Hoorah Semper Fi......... thank you for your service! Good luck to you brother.

 

[Captain America]

Hoorah Semper Fi......... thank you for your service! Good luck to you brother.

Errrrr dog! You are very welcome my friend! Haha I did 4 yrs, got out for 2 and then volunteered to go back in after September 11th and did another 2yrs. While I was in Germany my buddy and I just walked into pharmacies and asked for steroids. After being turned away 4-5 times we eventually found one that sold to us.

 

[addy]

I also wanted to add that if it weren't for being on this site and talking to megatron I probably still wouldn't have gone to get checked out. I used privatemdlabs thanks to him.

well count me in here as well bro , i did the same mistakes like u , had no knowledge whatsoever abt anything and did all my cycles without knowledge , without any single pcts , unlike u i had full access to net but just ignorance frm me and paid the price,feeling so crappy for a lot of years now ! i would say i almost ruined my youth ! until i came here to this forum and Austinite, Megatron and all the other BRO's here helped me with a lot of things ! like u i never went got my blood work , but here they told me to do it asap as its the only thing tht can tell us wats going on inside and where we are now so we can decide wat to do now !

i bugged them with all my stupid questions but they have been really nice always to guide me and its becos of them tht now i understand at least somethings ,here's my history if u wanna have a look :-

http://www.steroidology.com/forum/a...eports-there-any-improvement.html#post3514173

hope u get better now ! all the best , will be following ur progress!

 

[Harnold]

wouldnt wait to get bloods, i know exactly the way u feel, u got the symtoms of low T, why further the shit!, felt like garbage as well, after recovery to alcholism, i got my levels checked as well and they were as low as could be, felt anxious, depressed, sex drive was shit, u could put the hottest girl infront of me and my sex drive was in the ultimate low, all i wanted to do is lounge around all day long, all in all felt miserable, i feel great now by the way, cruise on 200mg/week for the last year and a half and feel awesome bro

good job on the recovery man, I got a severe concussion and the headaches are still around after almost four years. I was put on the good old oxy train, and got angry as it wasn't working and quit cold turkey. looking back it was a mistake, could have stroked out or seizured from the heavy dosages, but wouldn't go through that hell again, nor wish it on my worst enemy. that was three years ago. glad to hear of people bouncing back, as I dare say most don't, let alone go on to really transform themselves physically in the gym. Sorry for the hijack Capt.A .
good job Matt00

 

[juced_porkchop]

going in now is pointless you should wait atleast a couple months after pct....... no matter the result now you gotta go back in a couple to actually have a more valid test...
I wish you the best man! : )

 

[3J]

much respect... i'd rather deal with someone who makes a mistake and admits it than someone who blows lies and excuses all day..

make the changes cap! youre doing it right!

 

[Captain America]

going in now is pointless you should wait atleast a couple months after pct....... no matter the result now you gotta go back in a couple to actually have a more valid test...
I wish you the best man! : )

I know we will never know what my test levels were, but I am very in tune with my body and I've known something as wrong for years. The only time I felt any good was when doing the cycle last year.

I already saw an endo and have taken 2 blood tests and T was low. She prescribed 100 mg of test cypionate per week. I have another thread with the info about how it all went down.