This is just a pure case of addiction. You, by far have a complex. You'll never want to come off for fear of losing size. Which in turn is going to lead to severe depression and a whole list of symptoms that you don't care about cause your 19 and your unstoppable. You have simply set yourself up for failure. You know this, but don't care because you are extremely egotistical and 19 of course. This is like trying to explain to an alcoholic he has a problem and he's destroying himself and usually friends/family that surround him. His answer...I don't think I have a problem. Jesus man...you have got to be sick of hearing over 90post directed towards your self pitty and ignorance by now. No one wants to help someone who is completly mentally and psyically addicted. You need to "detox" get the fuck off your " I wanna get huge" highhorse and start over. Their is no reply or comment you could say to justify yourself, your wrong is the bottom line. Go ahead and think of something that makes you sound "smart" and conflicts with what I've said here, and send your reply. It dosen't matter to me one bit, I'm not the one with an extreme blinding stubborn addiction. I'll give you this though...at 19 I was not wrong about anything no matter what. Now I'm 30 and
"understand" why I was wrong.