Binge Eating on cycle support


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Been binge eating for close to 2 years now..Also been cutting for about the same amount of time and I dont even remember how it started but it was definitely slow and progressing.

I have ran 2 cycles, currently on my 3rd and have all been cutting cycles besides the first (test only) which I bulked but at a higher bf than I should have.

Im running tren a, test, anavar

I am 20. I am pretty huge for my age, around 15% body fat, 5'10.5 and hoovering 205-210lbs. All lifts are elite. I keep putting on size and strength because my cuts usually turn into slightly over maintenance and calorific surpluses, that it ends up always just being a slow bulk, hence why I have been consistently putting on size/strength but not losing the fat I want to lose.

I eat around 1700-1800 calories for cutting, workout 5-6 times a week and do 15 min cardio 2-3 times a week

Also I started cycling after getting diagnosed with low testosterone, and my doctor prescribing me test. Its obviously not healthy, but many of the risk factors behind blasting have been mitigated by the fact that I Blast and Cruise and dont have to hop off and I am monitored by a doctor.

The worst part of all is, I consider myself disciplined in life. I weight ALL of my meals, I ALWAYS hit my macros, cardio, workouts, and I know the whole science behind calories in vs out, have all my plans organized, excel plot for cycles, continuous blood work, etc. Its depressing when I binge because I do the math in my head and realize that eating 6k calories for 4 days would already scientifically speaking make me gain 3-4lbs of fat. That would take me 2-3 weeks of dieting just to make up for those 4 days of gluttony

When the binge eating begins its usually honest hunger. I can barely walk, stand up, I have extreme mental fog and I feel like shit to the point I feel like passing out. I usually have a large ass meal and decide to just make the day a bit of a calorific surplus. I do feel much better after I eat but then its a downward spiral and then the binge usually either lasts just for that day, or even a whole week..When I binge I stop working out, taking care of my trimming, hygiene, I spend all the money I dont have eating out, fast food, constant eating..Wouldn't be surprised if I consume 6k+ calories a day.

Cycling has helped me as I put on muscle when I binge eat even when I dont lift, but the fat gains are still there.

Does anyone suffer/suffered from this that can give me some tips? This is so detrimental to my life, my finances, obviously my health, and overall physique. I know the obvious answer is just stop but when it hits no matter how much I tell myself now how it wont happen again, it always fucking does.
There are psychological and physiological factors at work here. The psychological factors are best worked out through counseling/seeing a psychologist- I recommend you look into that.

Physiologically, you aren't eating enough while cutting. Increase your calories to 500 under maintenance and stop trying to be so extreme. If you aren't desperately hungry your chances of binging may go down.

My guess is that this will help, but that the underlying issue will need to be solved with the help of a professional. Your binges are similar to that of an alcoholic or addict. Not just over eating, but over eating at the expense of many things in your life, not just your health.

Please seek counseling.

My .02 cents.
^ I like those two cents. :)

Just wanted to add that there are hormones responsible for being hungry. As you cut, your body does NOT want to change. So to keep things as they are, it releases these hormones to trigger hunger. This is why Gaijin's advice is so good to take note of.

Small deficits are easier to stick to, and while the results take longer, they do less damage to your metabolism, and you don't release as much ghrelin (hunger hormone), keeping you from going nuts.

In my journey of losing somewhere around 250lbs of fat and putting on around 85lbs of lean mass I had to relearn how to eat as well. This meant knowing an occasional cheat meal was okay, but trying to stick to meals that SATISFIED me (high protein) while not cheating helped enormously. Fast food will wreck you as it's often loaded with sugar (addictive behavior trigger), so it's in your best interests to avoid it as much as possible.

In time, you'll feel so sick eating fast food, you'll stop craving it nearly as much, as you'll know that the consequences mean more than just fat gain. Be consistent and vigilant, you'll soon develop better eating habits. :)

My 0.02c :)