1st cycle went horrible, need advice for POSSIBLE 2nd one (please read)

[serber12345]

Please read before commenting....

Last cycle I ran went awful, just god awful. Ran dbol 50mg ed and test e 500mg ew. I ran 20mg nolva ED to avoid gyno.

I felt like absolute shit all cycle, which only lasted a full 4 weeks because I was literally having suicidal thoughts (estro, test suppression?? I literally don't know). I don't know why they made me so depressed. I gained a lot off weight, but yeah, just horrible depression and anxiety and I couldn't even function.

Upon further research after my cycle I came to the conclusion this is because I didn't use an AI with my cycle. Many said with my cycle I wouldn't even need it so I simply chose to go without one.

This time around I want to feel good. Period. I might just honestly blast and cruise from here on out, and eventually get on TRT. How can I optimise a good, light cycle that will just give me a good mental wellbeing.

I'm thinking JUST test, run very light at 250-300mg ew with an AI by my side in case I get ANY high estrogen symptoms at all. IT seems the estrogen makes me depressed and anxious, which is the worst.

Thoughts?

Also if anyone has time and experience with all of this stuff, could you please please please PM me. I really need to talk to someone personally as I have a list of questions that I don't just want to ramble off on this thread here.

Thanks!

 

[Mountain-Man]

I never use a Ai while on just keep it handy U may have suppressed ur estrogen so much u lost ur sex drive happens to me when I was a newbie and was scared of gyno I used 1 mg of adex Ed and mid cycle no sex drive so I'm just suggestion don't use the ai untill needed

 

[Megatron28]

Like I was saying in your other thread, increasing your testosterone levels will not cure underlying depression. You need psychological help to treat your mental illness.

http://www.steroidology.com/forum/t...r-testosterone-levels-yes-you-read-right.html

 

[serber12345]

Let me say this. I was a happy person PRIOR to my first cycle. After my cycle I was depressed. This has gotten better month by month, but still I don't know if I'm getting any better at this point. I remember when I was much much better. This IS a hormonal problem. Perhaps not low test but maybe high e or something else.

Let's remember the facts, I was fine and happy before steroids, after, I've been completely different.

Okay, so how in your mind do you think some sort of psychiatric med would help me then in my case?

 

[serber12345]

You need psychological help to treat your mental illness.

steroidology.com/forum/testosterone-replacement-therapy/684651-how-lower-testosterone-levels-yes-you-read-right.html

To be quite honest you sound very much like the rest of brainwashed society. do you realize how unreliable modern psychiatry is? How dangerous some of the psychiatric drugs they prescribe are? 99% of psychiatry is pseudoscience. Sorry if this offends you, but it is the truth.

Does that mean things like schizophrenia, bipolar, etc don't exist? No, that's not what I mean. I mean psychiatry as a science right now is deeply flawed and in a very early stage in it's development, a stage which I don't wish to put my faith in.

I don't have the "mental illness" of depression. This was directly caused by my use of androgens, and will be cured by drugs and possibly androgens again.

 

[Machine15]

hmmm seems to me like high e2. there are people that don't even need an AI and people who do, you are one of those people it seems
and you're saying your cycle only lasted 4 weeks ? highly doubt it's low test related. get blood work to see where your e2 is and in the meantime
just give it time and you'll be okay. good luck.

 

[Gainjin260]

To be quite honest you sound very much like the rest of brainwashed society. do you realize how unreliable modern psychiatry is? How dangerous some of the psychiatric drugs they prescribe are? 99% of psychiatry is pseudoscience. Sorry if this offends you, but it is the truth.

Does that mean things like schizophrenia, bipolar, etc don't exist? No, that's not what I mean. I mean psychiatry as a science right now is deeply flawed and in a very early stage in it's development, a stage which I don't wish to put my faith in.

I don't have the "mental illness" of depression. This was directly caused by my use of androgens, and will be cured by drugs and possibly androgens again.

You're saying the casue of your problems will be the solution? As somebody who's been through mental illness and addiction I can tell you from personal experience this is flawed thinking.

Mega isn't trying to be insensitive (he just writes as if he has Aspergers . And he didn't suggest a psychiatrist. If you'd rather not think of depression as a "mental illness", fine, seek treatment for your "depression". Try talking to a therapist. If you're feeling depressed chances are it isn't 100% from your last cycle. Clean out what you can from your closet before you try to fix things with more drugs and hormones. Start from a place of health, not a place of desperation.

This all seems rushed. Slow down, this is your mental and physical health FOR LIFE we're discussing here. Jumping back in to another cycle before you've fully evaluated both your mental and physical health is ill advised.

Please follow the advice given on your TRT thread and check into all the other health issues that could be giving you low T symptoms. Seek the help of a therapist if only for a session or two. Read up about how to properly cycle- all the info is on this site. Take your time and protect your health.

 

[ClarkFit]

I always push exemestane. Everything I've read claims that it will only crash E2 in very high doses. I can literally FEEL differences when adjusting my Stane dose. It seems like the best route for beginners. You can play with it somewhat without running the risk of making your e2 too low. (Within reason)

 

[Roush]

Let me say this. I was a happy person PRIOR to my first cycle. After my cycle I was depressed. This has gotten better month by month, but still I don't know if I'm getting any better at this point. I remember when I was much much better. This IS a hormonal problem. Perhaps not low test but maybe high e or something else.

Let's remember the facts, I was fine and happy before steroids, after, I've been completely different.

Okay, so how in your mind do you think some sort of psychiatric med would help me then in my case?

Perhaps !?? Why don't you just go get a full blood panel done and go get checked out and know for sure