Swolen,
I know what your going through, bro. I myself have been a heavy drinker for years. Mostly due to boredom, but then it quickly became habit.
I haven't had a drop in about a month now. I must say my mind is much clearer. It took a lot for me to quit. I almost lost my wife, business, everything. It was hard for the first 3 weeks not to pick up a drink. I had cold sweats at night, I'd get nervous and anxious, the whole shabang. Now that I'm over the month point it's getting easier and easier as the days go on. Grant it I still want to drink when I have a bad day, but I remind myself of all that I almost lost (and ended my ass in jail for a week and still have to go to court) and all that I still could lose.
I'm just 1 measly month dry, so I'm not trying to preach and please don't take it that way. But now that I am dry my work-outs have been much improved, memory is better and although I can't see it I'm sure my liver is giving me a BIG thumbs up.
Now, instead of sitting around drinking I'll go to the movies or hit the gym again. And you wouldn't believe how much money I'm saving from not buying booze every day. More money for gear and supps!
It's no cake walk, but believe me, you'll feel much better in the bigger scheme of things.
I hope you work this out, bro. It's VERY possible. Shit, if I can do it ANY-FUCKIN'-BODY can! Mind over matter. If you don't mind, it won't matter.
-Brian