question for the ladies

[DaHurt]

Wow, It must be hard to communicate or disagree with someone like this, I don't think her being Puerto Rican is what makes her act this way, yes, I know some hispanic women tend to be strong minded, but she behaves this way because it's just her personality.

I'm sure she's concerned for yoru health, but to not want to even hear about it it's a bit harsh... You have to be open to communication evene if u disagree with what's being said.

If you can't even mention it to her, then I don't see how u can educate her or make her understand. You've got a tough situation..

Good luck !

Mrs P always gives awesome advice/insight!

Trav I feel for you man...we've at least had the convo about "Would I ever do it" and I've told her I wouldn't hesitate if I decided I really wanted to pursue competitive bodybuilding...and she seemed okay with it...I just need to suck it up and tell her that I've already started!

 

[traviswyliedime]

thanks everyone for the insight! its like half of me wants to tell her because I love her and dont want to lie to her but the other half of me knows what is going to happen once I tell her...it will most likely be over.

 

[stevenmd]

From a woman's point of view, who doesn't use, I would want to be told about it, maybe slowly introduce them to her and educate her, tell her the reason why you do cycles.

I'm not puerto rican but I know many their a lot like the Filipina's out there. It might be worse if you continued to keep it a secret and she did find out one day.

I am very big on open communication, I don't like secrets.

Whatever you decide to do, good luck

Yeah, I'm in agreement here. A relationship with secrets is doomed for failure. If you can't be open and honest with her, maybe she's not the one. Or maybe she is the one and is worth not doing any cycles. That's a choice only you can make.

I'm lucky because even though I am in the middle of a divorce, my ex and I are pretty open with each other and help each other out when it comes to gear. She pinned me the first time - although I wonder if she did it because she got to have an excuse to stab me with something... but in all seriousness, any relationship you have, you need honesty. Shoot, my ex and I even use each other for advice on dating. I may not like her as a wife but we have kids together and her happiness is important to me. I have a great deal of respect for her as the mother of my children. OK, a bit off topic, sorry, but I think you get my point.

 

[Detour5]

Maybe you should just take the plunge. Tell her that you do it, but also let her see the things you do to keep yourself healthy like your Aromatase inhibitor (AI) and post cycle therapy (pct) regimine. Explain all the functions and show her that you take it seriously. She may surprise you with her reaction, but by telling her, you are showing her that you respect her enough to be honest with her - let her know that bit too. She's stayed with you so far, knowing this shouldn't change it as long as you've always been good to her.

 

[Mt-momma]

Personally, I wouldn't want my husband to feel as though he needed to hide anything from me. I think I would be more hurt that he felt the need to hide something (anything). Although, I will say that I have a super even keel personality and as I type this, I support my husband's goals and know he knows what he's doing in terms of his gear. Maybe, I'm biased? I say you need to tell her though. Do you think she doesn't suspect even a little anyway?
I don't think intentionally hiding anything in a serious relationship is healthy, be it money issues, alcoholism, drug use, depression, etc. Guess you have to judge how serious the relationship is and where it's headed though. It's one thing if it's your spouse or someone you're wanting to spend the rest of your life with. If the relationship is more casual or you don't see it being long term, then maybe now is not the time.

 

[stevenmd]

Personally, I wouldn't want my husband to feel as though he needed to hide anything from me. I think I would be more hurt that he felt the need to hide something (anything). Although, I will say that I have a super even keel personality and as I type this, I support my husband's goals and know he knows what he's doing in terms of his gear. Maybe, I'm biased? I say you need to tell her though. Do you think she doesn't suspect even a little anyway?
I don't think intentionally hiding anything in a serious relationship is healthy, be it money issues, alcoholism, drug use, depression, etc. Guess you have to judge how serious the relationship is and where it's headed though. It's one thing if it's your spouse or someone you're wanting to spend the rest of your life with. If the relationship is more casual or you don't see it being long term, then maybe now is not the time.

I wish there were more women like you.

 

[Sassytassie84]

As a woman dating a guy doing cycles, he was hesitant to tell me but... I mean... it's pretty obvious. I don't talk to him about it really cuz I know it's his decision. As for if you should tell her:

YES! If you don't think she would be happy about it, it's ok. If you think she will leave you over it then you should not be with her or should not do them. It's not an easy decision BUT if she finds out you are in bigger trouble. Not only will she know you do them, but compound you lied about it for X amount of time, only going to be worse. Sorry I know my grammer is not perfect here, but I am making dinner and going back and forth.