This goes way beyond the marriage too, gear doesn't substitute good diet, or anything well for LONG. People seem to forget that.
Sex also isn't a relationship in and of itself... how about a date night at least once every two weeks, dress up and all that jazz, many women like that. Or go to a play (shudder), mine likes live performances, so I "enjoy" them with her... kinda. Think back to the early days when things were good, if that helps, if it doesn't - then of course don't.
My wife prides herself on staying thin, she'll even avoid alcohol for a month or two at a time, do the South Beach diet and so on, and a few carbs and alcohol are totally within her character as well as mine. She thinks she looks bad when I'm ready to bend her over, so not all women have low self-standards.
The downside to her mentality being like this is that its really hard to get her in DIRTY lingerie.
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