I have focused a lot on what's improved. I had a small seizure yesterday morning just before I usually wake up. Figure this will be a good time to recap things. I had another seizure in the morning about a week > 10 days ago.
Originally I ate better and as the higher testosterone levels took effect eating was less work. By work, I mean eating is a chore for me. I can best explain it as eat a meal till you are full. After a while you'll hit a point where the fullness is gone but to eat isnt something you'd do, because you are full. I always feel like that. I didn't realize I did it but my wife says I "have a face" when I'm choking down food. It can also be compared to stimulants effect on hunger, except I'm sedated. I have went till dinner at 6pm, from 6am, and never felt hungry often. I'll become shaky, weak and feel confused. Sick almost, and I realize I haven't ate. Any medication that has stopped my seizures has suppressed my appetite. I'm back at that point. I had dropped to about 157lbs @ 3 wks ago. I am 160lbs now.
I resort to fat and junk food. I've realized point blank if I'm not gaining weight, I'm not eating enough. I think that dietary question has been resolved. Fat or mass, if we're eating enough to gain, we WILL gain one or both. Myself and other "hardgainers" have to do the 12 step thing and first admit we dont eat enough. "I, Mycelium, dont eat enough." haha
Peanut butter sandwhiches.
Instant oatmeal with a Tbl spn butter
Lunchmeat sandwhiches with fatty meat and cheese.
Scrambled eggs loaded with cheese and butter
As a way of adding more calories I'll do things like add a pack of poptarts to something. Its like 400 crap sugar calories. I can eat it in about 45 seconds with a glass of water, or better whole milk. I will just eat a Tbl spn of olive oil, coconut oil.
My memory is weird. I tend to stay on task, but medium and the long term are still bad. During the course of a day I will recall things from the morning as "yesterday". I quickly lose track of when things happened in reference to "the past". I know what day of the week is because of my medication container and ritualistic refilling. If I miss a days medication I can run a day behind for a couple days. Kids are getting ready for Monday school, but I'm taking the pills in Sundays slot. I still constantly lose my coffee.
Now working memory is better. Even when a task cant be completed I get it to a stopping point. I've worked in several smaller projects with my project of finishing our basement.
I am doing a lot more than before with the same medication so I believe reducing estrogen and raising testosterone HAS raised my seizure threshold. Even undereating. I think my recent seizures are my body telling me point blank I'm not eating enough and not taking care of myself. A medication increase is gonna happen. 20mg clobazam 2x day.
I'm far better off on TRT. With anything the ripples flow out and my entire household is better. But I'm hoping other epileptic males suffering will find this so the more information I can provide the better. This isnt a commercial promising paradise, this is a log. Real life.
In 2017 I would have problems spending a hot day on a pontoon. Dishes and laundry were my daily tasks.
2018 I have finished a pool pad, set up the pool, tore down a shed, cutting down trees, got my unfinished basement to partially drywalled, landscaped the yard and did several family events during the hottest days. Changed a water pump in the car, wheel bearings and upper control arms in the truck.
I am fortunate enough I get VA disability, but I lose $2,000-4000 per month sitting on disability. I was a licensed and insured contractor yet acted like a free agent semi skilled laborer for several large contractors and did easy side jobs. Once emptied an apartment in 2 hours with my wife and cleared about $3,200! I got $18 an hour crowning every board on a jobsite one day. I sent 5 hours in a lift with setting trusses. I had a contractor pay me to show up an hour early and set up the jobsite. Life was good. haha Convenience employee with their own insurance that is completely tax deductible.
I'll probably never get back to that level but I can make investments of time and improve my slice of earth.